i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
