Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize