Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize