I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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