No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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