You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I think my moral compass just broke
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
