How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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