glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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