I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
We have started to decorate penises.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
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