coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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