I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
