she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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