I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
