he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
