I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'm really into asian looking animals
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
