Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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