Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize