Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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