I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
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