I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
tell me about the fingering
Randomize