5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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