I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I just want to make out with him forever
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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