omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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