Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You ruined the universe
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