Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
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