well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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