Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
