Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
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