Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
