We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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