I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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