i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize