I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
