did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
A+ Viking dick
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
