dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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