This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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