I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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