i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
