We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Randomize
