youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
