i don't like sucking hair
worst night to have a conscience
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
