My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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