But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
