u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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