I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
