Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
