did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
