Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize