All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
