I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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