ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
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